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Only love can win

http://www.catholicteacherresources.com/2012/02/peace-prayer-service/

I’m going to say some stuff here that some people may not like.  And that’s okay.  We’re allowed to have a difference of opinion and still love each other around here.  If you can’t do that, allow me to tip my hat to you as you make your way over to another, less offensive blog for now.  Hope to see you back here real soon.

So here’s the deal:

There’s some shit going down on the other side of the world.  It’s all over the news on tv and on the radio and in the paper and in social media.

A lot of people have been all up in my Facebook these days with their opinions on the recent flareup of violence in the Middle East.  I’ve got people filling up my newsfeed with pro-Israeli reports and other people filling up my newsfeed with pro-Palestinian reports.  And other people filling up my newsfeed with cat videos, which is the most offensive of all.  But I digress.

I’m not an expert in politics in general, and I’m certainly not the most knowledgeable about Mideast politics.  It seems that the issues run so deep and so far back and are so tangled up in culture and religion and economics that to truly understand the heart of the matter would take years of study and conversation and to be quite honest with you, my heart just can’t take it.  Just scratching the surface of it right now is almost too much to bear.

Because I have a daughter who is both Jewish and Muslim.  She has blood coursing through her veins that carries the history of slavery and oppression, of conquerors and pharohs, and of people who just can’t freaking get along.  And truly, I worry sometimes about the weight she will carry in her life because of it.

The day will come when she will ask me what side I’m on.  My opinion will matter not only because I’m her mother, but because I’m a Muslim woman who chose a Jewish man.  And I still choose him, happily and wholeheartedly, every single day.

And also I know, in her heart, she will be asking me what side she should be on.  But how can she pick a side?  How can she turn her face to her left, trying to deny her right?  How can she pretend that choosing in favour of one side isn’t also choosing against another, and that would mean choosing against herself?  How can she choose between her mother and her father?

In our house, in our family, she will never have to.  I am committed to this with all my heart, and I will shoot down and knock out anyone in our extended families who try to sway her to one side.

We are not going to get into who’s right and who’s wrong.  Both sides have arguments that are valid, and both sides have arguments that hold no water with me.  So they can have their reasons, and they are welcome to them.  And that’s what we will teach our daughter.

And when she asks how she is to choose a side, we will tell her she doesn’t have to.  All she has to choose is love.  Each side feels they are right.  Each sides feels they’ve been wronged.  Love them both.  Honour them both.  Fight for them both.  Not for one side to win, but for both sides to win.  Not for one side to conquer,overcome, and defeat, but for love to conquer, overcome and defeat.

We will not pick sides.  We will simply hold up love as our standard.  That’s all she needs to know.

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5 thoughts on “Only love can win

  1. I don’t think that anyone can logically disagree with anything you wrote. If only more parents taught their children similar values.

  2. As the first gen of biracial, multi culture babies in the fam.. we didnt have to choose. We had both! We loved both. We looked forward to going to Toronto for Kushiali as much as did for Easter celebrations. As we learned to critically think, we picked the pieces that worked best for us and we made our own little spirituality out of it.

  3. Just like Chrissy, Amira will have both and will not have to choose as both sides of her extended family are respectful of all religions. Just look at our family now, we have a Jewish son-in-law, a Ukranian Catholic, hopefully, future daughter-in-law, and further extensions of our family have married a Chinese girl, a Pakistani girl, a Hindu girl, and there may be a future Irish boy in the family too. The list goes on. So as far as Amira is concerned, she will be loved, honoured and cherished for whatever her beliefs will be in the future. You won’t have to “shoot down and knock out anyone in our extended families who try to sway her to one side”, as this will not happen ;).

  4. Beautiful times 100. It is exactly people like you, and families like yours that will make the future brighter for our children. Maybe there really will come a day when skin is just a colour and beliefs are something to celebrate, not die for.

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